sing with me....

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
I'm standin' here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin', it's early morn
The taxi's waitin', he's blowin' his horn
Already I'm so lonesome I could die

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

I'm ...

There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I'll tell you now, they don't mean a thing

Every place I go, I think of you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
When I come back I'll wear your wedding ring

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time, oh, let me kiss you
And close your eyes and I'll be on my way

Dream about the days to come
When I won't have to leave alone
About the times that I won't have to say ...

Oh, kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go

'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

And I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go

But I'm leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
Leaving on a jet plane
(Ah ah ah ah)
(Leaving) On a jet plane

packing checklist

shoes? CHECK

jeans? CHECK

underwear? CHECK

cat? CHECK

oh dear Lord no

no, please no.

it appears that edward george has a brother, and he's coming to visit for a wihle.

don't they know this is a bad time for visitors???? this is so unfair!!!

somebody please shoot me now.....

MORE????

MORE???

you want me blogging MORE???

do you all think i am some kind of machine???

don't you realize that my life is in shambles?? i am packing to move, and packing to travel to australia. for the last six weeks my life has been poured onto boxes: its been a month since i've eaten off a dish that wasn't absorbent, used a knife that wasn't doing double duty as a screwdriver, ripped open box after box because i can't find my apres-bain thermal citrus and kiwi oxygene booster body scrub (and i cannot LIVE without my apres-bain thermal citrus and kiwi oxygene booster body scrub!!!) discovered entirely new morphological species of DUST and its been at least three weeks since i've seen one of my cats!!! i have tape stuck to every surface of my apartment *sob* and i am wearing underpants that come up to HERE because i packed all the good stuff!!!!

and ON TOP OF THAT i have gotten a pimple so HUGE, so DISGUSTING, so IMMENSE that the people that run the hubble space telescope alerted the people that climb mt. everst who are now contacting me to ask if they can use my ZIT for training runs!!! its been 12 years since i have broken out and suddenly, a week before i leave to spend time with the love of my life i get a break out SO DAMN HUGE i named it!! *sob*



that's right! i NAMED IT and its name is edward. edward george!! its such a HUMOUNGOUS pimple that it even has a middle name!!! the fact that my ZIT is named after royalty is irrelevant, the fact is that as hideous and disgusting as i look i STILL HAVE TO GO TO AUSTRALIA because i didn't buy PIMPLE INSURANCE and you want me to blog more????

does the hysterical and slighty demented look in my eyes not tell you all you need to know? does not the hair say "my village called and their new idiot isn't working out so i need to go home"??? can you not see the desperate need i am in OF SEDATION????

i am on the verge of meeting the person who is my DESTINY and every one of my nails is chipped and broken, my face is a festering sore and i know for a FACT that i will wake up the day i leave FIFTY POUNDS HEAVIER and you want me to be AMUSING???

why don't you *sob* just stick a knife in my heart??? oh wait! i know why!!! ITS BECAUSE I'VE PACKED THEM ALL AWAY!!!

do you really *sob* all hate me that MUCH???

I CAN'T TAKE MUCH MORE OF THIS!!! WHY DON'T YOU ALL GO BOTHER AUNT AGNES?? SHE'S NOT DOING TOO MUCH THESE DAYS I HEAR. JUST GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!

*GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH*

i need martini and a fat free cookie... *sob*

meet the feebles....

hey y'all,

there's someone i'd like you to meet.

she's really quite a lovely person, in her own disturbing way '-)

fascinating

i am noticing that while i am trying to shed a few pounds before meeting bruce for the first time in person (sue me, i am a girl), i am having little success. clearly this is for one reason and one reason alone:

every ounce of body fat wants to meet him too.

and so, apparently, do my gray hairs. as a matter of fact, they seem to be particularly excited about meeting him as they have begun telling their friends to show up early and get a good seat.

addendum: should i be worried?